Interesting Life Bits

"Sometimes when I reflect back on all the wine I drink I feel shame Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the vineyards and all of their hopes and dreams . If I didn't drink this wine, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this wine and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver."
~ Jack Handy

"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. "
~Frank Sinatra

"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading."
~ Henny Youngman

"When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. So, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!"
~ Brian O'Rourke

"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
~ Benjamin Franklin

"Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza."
~ Dave Barry

"Well ya see, Norm, it's like this... A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first This natural selection is good for t he herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers."
~ Cliff Clavin, Cheers

Hurricane Chamiqua

Ok so this was sent to me as a forward. Don't hate, I did have a small laugh...

Well, it appears Jessie Jackson and Al Sharpton have found yet something else to be pissed about. Maxine Waters, a black congresswoman reportedly complained that the names of hurricanes are all Caucasian sounding names. She would prefer some names that reflect African-American culture, such as Chamiqua, Tanisha, Woeisha, Shaqueal, and Jamal. She would also like the weather reports to be broadcast in language that street people can understand because one of the problems in New Orleans is that regular folks couldn't understand the seriousness of the situation due to the racially biased language of the weather report. I can hear it now: A Houston weatherman says:

"Wazzup, mutha-fukkas! Hehr-i-cane Chamiqua be headin' fo' yo ass like Leroy on a crotch rocket! Bitch be a category fo'! So grab yo' chirren, yo'Ho, be leavin yo crib, and head fo' da nearest guv'ment office fo yo FREE shit!"

09F9 : The Cyber-revolt of 2007

Recently, the copyright protection for the new HD-DVD format was hacked and the unlock code was released onto the internet. Digg.com tried to stop the spread of the AACS processing key, but in so doing made the 32-digit hexadecimal number the most popular number in modern history.

The code has spread like a virus everywhere. A simple Google search will return as much as 2 million results. By deleting posts and banning users, Digg spurred an online revolt against big business politics. The front page of Digg had post upon post of users spreading the word about the broken code. Some included the actual code, while some just smacked on Digg for deleting previous posts and told users to search Google.

Where did the code end up?? Well...
- eBay auctions
- personal websites and blogs, like mine
- shirts
- buttons
- pictures and drawings posted on Flickr and Photobucket
- a song, “Oh Nine, Eff Nine” with guitar background

After a length of time, the site was forced to shut down due to server strain. This also gave the company heads a chance to come up with a formulated response. Co-founder Kevin Rose brought the website back up with a response that Diggers would “rather see Digg go down fighting than bow down to a bigger company.” It is reasonable that they would have had the initial response that they did because of the potential for a lost sponsor (HD-DVD is an ad-sponsor for some pages on Digg) and of course a lawsuit is never out of the question (remember Viacom?).

This is another example of how the world is changing. Large companies continue to try to reinforce the hold they have on industry from which they profit. Microsoft, Viacom, Apple... these are all companies who are used to easy profit and are in a panic that they mean nothing to us. The more they try, the harder they fall. Security is hacked weeks after release, movies are downloaded in full before they hit the theaters, Digital Rights Management (DRM for music) is but a carboard barrier.

Knock, knock, big boys. The way of the future is safer, easier, and it also happens to be free. We are the users of the internet. Feel our wrath.

The Real Cinco de Mayo

With the recent political and social unrest regarding Mexican immigration and the negative reaction to President Bush's speech on the issue, many of us have developed a point of view that has less to do with facts than it has to do with popular opinion. Society today tends react react as if programmed with a predisposition towards immigration and its effect on our culture and economy.

Every day people contact me at work (I work for National City, the 8th largest bank in the states) and rant unyieldingly about the use of the Spanish language in our ATMs. They find it ridiculous and disrespectful of our citizenship that we must "press 1" to have our transaction displayed in English.

This being the case, I found it refreshing when I came across such a well written article today about the effect that Mexico has had on the United States. Many of us don't realize that Cinco de Mayo is not actually a celebration of independence, but of a single battle that had an immeasurable impact on both Mexico and on the ongoing civil war in the United States.

On the morning of May 5, 1862 4,000 Mexican soldiers smashed the French and traitor Mexican army of 8,000 at Puebla, Mexico, 100 miles east of Mexico City. This victory kept Napoleon III from supplying the confederate rebels, which led to the Confederates' defeat at Gettysburg just 14 months after the battle of Puebla. In truth, Mexico essentially ended the United States' civil war.

Union forces were then rushed to the Mexico border under General Phil Sheridan to help expel the French. The American Legion of Honor marched in the Victory Parade in Mexico, City. Because of our help, Mexicans have offered assistance to the the United States after Pearl Harbor and in the Persian Gulf War.

Cinco de Mayo is a celebration freedom, liberty, and the joining of cultures to fight for these great causes. There are two ideals which Mexicans and Americans share.

Please click here for the article.

When I'm famous.

Sometimes I sit at work and pretend I'm a movie star. "I'm sorry, but this studio room simply won't do. I need an upgrade and you have five minutes. And tell the chef I wanted caviar with my sushi.."

Pay by Mobile

Nokia, LG, Samsung, Sony and MasterCard are going to make it easier for consumers to shop! Like we need that. There is a plan in motion to make cell phones that can be waived in front of a scanner to make purchases, as with a credit card. This type of service has apparently been available for years in Japan and Hong Kong.

"After several fragmented initiatives, the mobile phone industry is now uniting around a single approach to enabling the mobile phone to be used, instead of cash or plastic credit card, at point of sale," Rob Conway, CEO of the GSM Association, the global trade association for cell phone operators, told Reuters.

It would stand to reason that there will be a security question or PIN number that must be entered into the phone that would enable the purchase. It would be great if it also revealed a picture of the person authorized to make purchases with that mobile device. The benefit being that if your phone is stolen, no purchases could be made by an unauthorized user.

October will bring more news, along with trials of the new services. Click here for more information.

Places you wish you grew up...

This is a partial re-post of a great writeup. Click here if wish to read the entire original post.

Q: Are there any societies where homosexuality is predominant?

A: Ah, this brings us to my favorite cultural sexual oddity, which occurs in Sambia, New Guinea. In the Sambia tribe, as early as age 7, young boys are expected to “suck the penis of a mature boy every night and swallow the sperm" (I'd make a joke if I wasn't terrified). Boys who refuse are forever treated as children within the context of their community, because “without regular ingestion of male seed, the Sambia believe, boys will never grow up into strong, mature men.” At the age of 15, the boys are considered mature enough to provide their own genitals for the younger boys to felicitate. Performing fellatio on a younger boy is strictly forbidden; as it is considered stealing his manhood because it results in a loss of semen from the growing boy (makes me wonder if they replace their “Got Milk?” ads with the tagline “Got cum?” No? Awww shucks). As soon as the boys marry, they cease to engage in homosexual contact, but often times, since they are so estranged from female sexuality and coitus, they ask their new brides to wear a bag over her head and fellate them on their wedding night. Interestingly, according to Loving Boys Vol. 1 (haha, cum again?), “After 10 to 15 years of exclusive homosexual activity carried on by 100 % of the Sambia population, the incidence of adult homosexual orientation is only 5 % - exactly the same as in Western society.” So...short answer, yes, long answer, no.

Source: Brongersma E: Loving Boys Vol. 1. Elmhurst. New York.: Global Academic Publishers, 1986.

Source: Crooks, Robert L. & Baur, Karla (2004) Our Sexuality 9th edition. Wadsworth Publishing Company, 276.